Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.
Galatians 6:2 (NIV)Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has ascended into heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin.
Hebrews 4:14-15 (NIV)Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.
James 5:16 (NIV)The Church's Secret
Here is a secret that most churches will not admit: we have an anxiety problem. Not just in the culture. In the pews. In the small groups. In the leadership meetings. In the youth groups. Christians struggle with anxiety at roughly the same rate as everyone else. Maybe higher. And yet, we do not talk about it.
Why Shame Keeps Us Silent
Why? Because anxiety brings shame. And shame keeps us silent.
The Sound of Shame
The shame sounds like this: "If I really trusted God, I would not be anxious." "Other people have it worse than me, and they are not falling apart." "I should be able to handle this." "There must be something wrong with my faith."
The Sound of Silence
And the silence sounds like this: smiling on Sundays. Saying "I am fine" when asked. Lying in bed at night feeling like the only person in the world who cannot just "let go and let God." Showing up to church with a racing heart and a tight chest and pretending everything is okay.
How the Church Has Failed
The church has not known how to talk about anxiety. We have treated it as a spiritual problem that requires a spiritual solution. We have told people to just pray more, trust more, have more faith. And when that does not work, we have made them feel like they are doing something wrong.
The Culture of Pretending
We have created a culture where people feel like they cannot be honest about what is really going on. They cannot say "I am struggling." They cannot say "I am scared." They cannot say "I am not okay." Because they are afraid of what people will think. They are afraid of being judged.
The Burden Problem
We cannot carry each other's burdens if we do not know what they are. The church is supposed to be the place where people can be real. Where people can admit they are struggling. Where people can say "I need help" without being shamed for it.
Be Honest With One Person
Today, tell one person in your church that you struggle with anxiety. Not to fix it, just to be honest. Notice what happens. Notice if they breathe a sigh of relief and share their own struggle. Notice if it creates connection instead of judgment. If your church does not have space for honesty, start by being the person who creates that space. Say "me too" when someone else is honest.
- What shame have you felt about your anxiety in church settings?
- What would it look like to be honest about your struggle?
- How has the church's silence about mental health hurt you?
- What would it mean to be part of a church that makes space for anxiety?
- Can you believe that your anxiety does not disqualify you from anything?
- What would change if you were honest about your struggle?
- How can you help create space for others to be honest?
Father, forgive the church for creating shame around anxiety. Forgive me for the times I have hidden my struggle instead of being honest. Help me to be part of a church that makes space for real conversations. Give me the courage to be honest about my struggle. And give me compassion for others who are hiding. Teach us to carry each other's burdens. Help us to be the place where people can say "I am not okay" and find help instead of shame. In Jesus' name, Amen.
You are not alone. So many people in your church feel exactly what you feel.
With honesty and hope, Claire